How The PandaCam Became a PandaSCAM
I know you’re all happy as statist little welfare-dependent clams that the government is back online, but one of the worst results of the shutdown is being sadly overlooked. It is the horror of the truth behind the National Zoo Panda-cam.
It began innocently enough – the aftermath of the shutdown hit the panda bears, and it hit them hard.
Pandas hardest hit.
But as I perused the scenes on the Panda-cams some more, I noticed something… strange..
These were secret transmissions obtained by the sooper-mexy staff, and it appeared that the pandas were unaware that we were watching:
Say it ain’t so, Panda-cam!!
Two weeks later, after spending an inordinate amount of time on a psychologist’s couch, I thought I had recovered. I thought I was ready to welcome the Panda-cam back into my life.
I was not prepared for what was about to happen.
The Panda-cam was back on, but odd and confusing images met my eyeballs once more.
What is going on? I can’t take this! I need to call my therapist…
Oh my panda!! Who did this to you?! Why, Gaia, why?!?!?
I will never be the same again, Panda-cam.