Forget the Whole Country, Obama to Focus On Five Small ‘Promise Zones’

Get ready for Obama’s next scheme of Hope, America! The administration has decreed that the focus of the federal government shall fall on… five small regions.

They shall henceforth be known as the “Promise Zones” – the only places in America where Obama’s promises are still good. Well, no, not really. Here they are, in all their glory:


The rest of us are safe from the long arm of Big Government. Actually, that’s not the case, but these five will have Obama’s unmitigated paternalistic guidance – because Philadelphia and Los Angeles haven’t already been destroyed enough by liberal policies.

The Promise Zone initiative, put forth in Obama’s 2013 State of the Union speech, aims to partner local businesses with the community “to create jobs, increase economic security, expand access to educational opportunities and quality, affordable housing and improve public safety,” the statement said.

How many times has he promised this already?

The zones will combine several other revitalization efforts such as the Obama administration’s Promise Neighborhoods and Choice Neighborhoods that fund local programs aimed at education, housing and other areas.

Again – hasn’t he been saying he would do this kind of stuff for all Americans? I can bet he won’t do what liberals have been demanding the most – a $15 minimum wage. And I’d really love to see it. Also, haven’t Native Americans seen enough meddling from the federal government? Are they really so eager to welcome in greater involvement from the long fascist arm of bureaucracy?

After taking home the “lie of the year” award in 2013, we’re not sure living in one of Obama’s “promise zone” is the best thing. Good luck, promise zoners!

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