Tragedy Strikes Obama: Latest Vacation May Be Shortened Over Ukraine

All Americans weep in distress today at the terrible news that President Obama has suffered another tragedy, possibly inspired by racism, in his troubled second term as our paternalistic government all-father.

In what may take the title of “a day that will live in infamy” away from December 7th, 1941, President Obama learned today that his latest lavish vacation planned for this weekend may be cut short due to developments in Ukraine. The hard-working Vacationer-In-Chief was to make the great sacrifice of enjoying the warm beaches and extravagant golf courses of the Ocean Reef Club in Key Largo, a “private, five-star paradise on 2,500 lush, tropical acres.” All for your sake, you selfish taxpayer.

But alas, the egotistical, self-serving citizens of the Ukraine just won’t let our benevolent big government overseer get the much-needed and well-earned rest he needs:

“It is possible the president may return to the White House on Friday as events unfold in Ukraine,” White House spokesman Josh Earnest said on Thursday, according to the Mail.

The excuse for this urgently needed break from the hurly-burly of the White House is that both Obamas are scheduled to speak about the value of education at Coral Reef High School in Miami.

 Oh the humanity! When will the world stop oppressing our loving president and give him a moment to rest his brow?

He bravely took to Las Vegas the day after the Benghazi attack, and gravely declared “Democrat Happy Hour” minutes after telling the world that Russia had invaded Ukraine – when can he rest? He obviously didn’t get enough rest during his golf trip to California last month, or when the whole First Family vacationed to Hawaii at a cost of $4 million. Neither did Michelle Obama get enough beauty sleep when she spent an extra week in Hawaii before attending the national party for her 50th birthday. The First Family of frugality spent as little as possible tax-payer money on their $11 million attendance at Nelson Mandela’s funeral, and when Michelle went to Ireland at a $5 million cost, or during the Martha’s Vineyard trip, or the “Tonight Show” trip.

Why won’t the world please just let Obama rest for a second?!