Politics

Cecil The Lion’s Brother Killed, White Liberals Hardest Hit, Zimbabweans Don’t Care Much

This is one of my favorite stories this week. Liberals freaked out over “Cecil the Lion” being killed by an American dentist and now the headlines are dominated by the news that his brother lion has also been killed, this time illegally. While limp-wristed hipster baristas in America sign petitions to impose their standards on an African country, actual Zimbabweans are puzzled as to what the hubbub is all about.

From the Business Insider:

While the death of a protected lion in Zimbabwe has caused outrage in the United States — much of it centered on the Minnesota dentist who killed the animal — most in Zimbabwe expressed a degree of bafflement over the concern.

The discovery that Cecil, the star of Zimbabwe national park had been lured out and killed by American bow hunter Walter James Palmer has resulted in online anger and protests at his dental clinic.

Outside Zimbabwe’s environmental and activist circles, however, the reaction been muted.

“It’s so cruel, but I don’t understand the whole fuss, there are so many pressing issues in Zimbabwe — we have water shortages, no electricity, and no jobs — yet people are making noise about a lion?” said Eunice Vhunise, a Harare resident. “I saw Cecil once when I visited the game park. I will probably miss him. But honestly the attention is just too much.”

An economic meltdown over the past few years has closed many companies and left two-thirds of the population working in the informal economy while battling acute water and electricity shortages.

What? How dare those Africans not care about what some petition a bunch of liberal douchebags have signed?!?! That sounds racist somehow.

Most people questioned in downtown Harare hadn’t actually heard about the lion and said they were too busy trying to make a living to care about it.

One resident, however, noted that the lions were needed to bring in tourism and Palmer should be fined with the money going toward animal conservation.

LOL! They hadn’t even heard of it!!

Doesn’t this sound like exactly the kind of colonial imposition of white culture on blacks? But somehow that’s ok because it’s protecting animals. I wonder if those idiots signing that petition would want our abortion, death penalty or gay rights laws determined by petitions signed by Africans? I’m dying over here.

Watch Stupid Hippies Do What Stupid Hippies Are Best At: FAIL